Death – How to step up.


Source: via Janelle on Pinterest

“A heart, A hand – to show I understand, I will step up and follow a loving plan.”

We’ve been on both sides, the death of someone in our life or someone close to us suffering a loss in theirs. 

Or will be at some point in our lives, death is part of life. Last week my husband lost a family member and our daughter lost a young friend in a tragic accident. It was an emotional week and I wanted to be there to console each of them as they processed their grief. Since everyone deals with their emotions differently, my main focus was to be understanding. 

I set my intention – for both of them to know I love them and I care about what they are going through. 

My empathy was so large, for my husband and his family, for my daughter and her friends, and for the parents who lost their child. As a mother, I could only imagine how difficult that would be. 

How do you show your support?

  • Listen: In order for that person to process their emotions, they may need to talk about it. I also picked up on some cues for what they may need from me. They might want to be left alone. There are other ways to show you care without overstepping. Pay attention to the cues. Are they eating? Do they need some cleaning, errands done, etc? You can be present without being in their face if that’s what they wish.
  • Acknowledge: I wanted each of them to feel that I heard them, that their emotions are valid, and I understood. Be sensitive to their emotions and needs.
  • Space: I gave them some space so they could have some alone time. This can be tricky because too much space may be interpreted that they are alone in dealing with this or that I don’t care.
  • Action: A shoulder to cry on, a hug, and extra thoughtful things as an expression to care for them. Flowers, prayers, a card, and/or send food, etc.
  • Continued Support: I don’t believe in putting a time frame on how long someone should grieve. Holidays and birthdays can be a difficult time, just learning to move on without their physical presence is a new experience and takes time to adjust. 


 If your objective is emulating an expression of love, your good intentions and warm energy will be perfect support. 

Being supportive and loving is constant. It doesn’t mean you put your life on hold but taking a few minutes to call, email, or send a note is comforting. 

Sometimes the love that is needed is just for you to be present and that person to know with absolute certainty, that you are there.

Love, Light, & Blessings to you,